Romancing Your Past
Some people are surprised when I say how much I enjoyed drinking and getting high. It’s true. I had some great times when I used. Concerts. Trips. Volleyball on the sandbar in the middle of the intercoastal.
Unfortunately, I have a disease that always required me to keep going until I blacked out or passed out. Not every time when I drank or drugged did something bad happen, but whenever bad things happened, I had been drinking and drugging. My use hurt a lot of people.
I’m comfortable saying I had some great times drinking and drugging because I don’t romance it. I balance the good time thoughts with the reality of where my disease took me. Also, what it took from me.
Alcoholics and addicts get in trouble when they only remember the fun times. That’s why I feel meetings are so crucial to our recovery. I need to balance how good it was with the truth of how bad it was. That’s what’s waiting for me if I’m not careful. If I romance the past, the past will once again become my present. That will destroy me and those that love me. I’ll lose everything.
What about you? Are you ever in danger of romancing the past?